Bathing Suit?
Today’s question is: Why would anyone wear a worn out bathing suit to the beach (or anywhere)?
Background: This is not only a story but also a warning, a warning about what not to do. I had the pleasure of having nice and warm weather for one day today. It was like summer is supposed to be. So after the kids went to their class and I allowed them sufficient time to get good and bored hanging around in the yard, I took them to the beach. We had been there a little while and I was enjoying a great article about Twitter in Time Magazine, when I looked over at the two woman and child that arrived next to me and was, let’s just say, a little surprised at what I saw.
I sat there looking at this young-ish, rather large lady wearing a one piece bathing suit. When she turned around, I noticed this odd oval shaped spot right down the middle of the butt area. Upon further notice (ok I was staring but I had my big dark glasses on and it wasn’t like she was looking my way) I realized that the oval shape was really a worn out section of her bathing suit and what wasn’t immediately apparent was now screaming at me, it was her butt crack.
That’s right, I could see her butt crack, PLAIN as DAY!
Her butt crack, at a public beach. Not just the top edge (that shows when ladies bend over with jeans on), that bathing suit was worn down so that you could make out most of her butt. I was embarrassed for her but how do you tell a complete stranger that her bathing suit is worn out, completely, right at her butt crack? You just can’t do it. What I really want to know is why her friend didn’t tell her? I mean, I tell people all the time that they have food in their teeth, you better believe I’d tell a friend if their ass was clear as day showing through their suit.
Because I’m me, I sat there wishing I brought my camera so I could take a picture of it, it was that unbelievable. Once she walked down the beach I remembered I could get a pretty good picture with my blackberry. However she never came back. Probably better you don’t have to actually see it. The image I painted for you should be good enough.
Do yourself a favor and make sure all your bathing suits are in good condition before you head to the beach or pool this summer. Consider this your warning!
June 15, 2009 @ 10:15 pm
Please do us all a favor and bring your camera next time. I thought you were going to say she was wearing her underwear, which I have seem MANY times – seemingly mostly by people from Europe. I would weigh butt crack as more socially acceptable than undies only because I've seen many a hyper thong flossing them cheeks. Nothing is grosser that a water-logged cotton panel.
Comment by Anonymous — June 15, 2009 @ 11:33 pm
Bah! That's a great one. Watching you try to snap a discreet picture of that w/ your blackberry would've been pretty hilarious too!
Comment by Lollyellen — June 16, 2009 @ 6:55 am
OMG water logged cotton panel, on a big old ass? I think I'd about die laughing. My camera would be a necessity for that for sure.
I so wish I could have thought of that picture just a little bit earlier. And seriously, when the guy next to me noticed, I completely cracked up (he didn't see me watching but it was so funny when he leaned over to the lady next to him and clearly mentioned the butt crack through the bathing suit). That poor girl.
Comment by colette — June 16, 2009 @ 2:36 pm
OMG! That is so nasty (and I totally wish you'd had your camera handy!!). I don't really want to go to the visual in my mind!
Comment by wendy — June 16, 2009 @ 9:21 pm
Found you through PW and omg.. this brings a clear vision of a woman I know to mind… and I can say she would not CARE if she knew anyway, she'd just figure it was other people's problem! You go to the beach to get a nice view of the sea and instead you get a nice view of… mhmm.
Comment by Bobosaurus Wranlger — June 29, 2009 @ 8:51 am
haha, yeah, let's just say it wasn't too pleasant!
Comment by colette — June 29, 2009 @ 9:42 am
How long do you have to own a bathing suit for that to happen?
And people wear underwear with their bathing suits?
It just isn't right.
Comment by Dawn — June 29, 2009 @ 1:25 pm